Thank you for your fast yet useless response.

I'm moving on to my continuing adventures with the DC Government - and no, I'm not writing about Marion Barry. You'll have to check my Facebook page for that crazy shit.

No, I'm talking about the inner workings of this completely dysfunctional entity itself. Have you ever tried to get help from them? Any of them? Have you ever tried to give helpful feedback? 

Don't bother. Just slap some duct tape on whatever your problem is and move on. You'll be much better off.

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From: Me
Subject: Problems with online form

 

Good afternoon, Mr. DC Gov (not his real name - but his real name is listed on the paper form as the person to contact if I have any problems or questions. I suspect he is unaware that his email is being published for this purpose):

 

For several months now I’ve been trying to use the online form to enter separation information, and I can never get past this point:

 

[ SCREEN SHOT ]

 

Do you have any suggestions for me?

 

Thank you,

My fancy and important-looking auto-signature

  

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From: Mr. DC Gov
Subject: RE: Problems with online form

 

Good afternoon,

   I don’t work with these forms but what you can do is fax the form to our Central Adjudication Unit.

The number (fax) 202 xxx xxxx/xx and make it to the attention of Pxxxxxxxx Mxxxxxxx.(Supervisor) She will forward the information to the appropriate claims examiner handling the case. Have a good day. ..

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From: Me
Subject: RE: Problems with online form

 

I end up faxing them all the time – I was hoping to cut out that part of the process and use the online form, which seems to be broken. Perhaps you could forward my email to the person who does work with these forms?

 

Thank you anyway for your fast response.

Comments

[S]

Kafka. Maybe it's like a performance art installation of bringing Kafka to life.